It’s a Good Thing

Today I’m going to share something very personal, but it will help with my topic of discussion. It’s hard for me to share this as some family read my blog. So, I’m exposing and tattling on myself.

In December of 2010, I was part of a lawsuit entitling me to a substantial amount of money. It would come in different amounts and at varying times.

About a month ago, I received a call from my attorney handling any disbursed funds from this lawsuit. He left me a message he had received a disbursement of a little over 500 dollars. I was so excited!

My husband and I have been living pretty tight. We both in years past had spent too much and put things on credit cards. He had managed to pay off all of the credit cards. Recently, I charged up some more debt on one of the credit cards. I thought I’d spend a little bit and pay off some things with the rest of the money I would receive.

Here’s a long story short. I ended up spending more than the 500 plus dollars and my husband was furious when he went to pay the credit card bill and realized I’d put more money on it. Then, I hadn’t received the check yet and I called my attorney. I had forgotten about his fee being taken out. Over 500 dollars dropped drastically to 350 dollars.

I had put money on the credit card, spent money from my disability check and had spent the cash he had given me for expenses. All added up it was quite a bit of money spent. He had every right to be furious with me.

I had even taken my daughter with me when I spent some of the money and she knew how we were trying not to spend. She asked about it several times, being the voice of reason and extending the word of caution. I had told her I had money coming in and I wouldn’t get dad mad, because it was “extra” money.

Let me tell you something. If you are in debt, no matter how much, there is no such thing as “extra” money. I could have used that money for several things other than what I spent it on. Most importantly, I could have used it to pay on one of the credit card balances.

I didn’t exercise any self-control and I have spent money I shouldn’t have before. Did you know that self-control is a fruit of the Spirit? It says so in Galatians 5:22-23

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control…

Ouch! I really hurt listing those, especially the self-control. It is one of the ways people should recognize you as a Christian. The last blog I wrote I honored my husband by talking about how much he shows me he loves me and I said I don’t think I show him enough love. Well, this is one example why I said that. This is one way I should honor my husband that I haven’t been doing. I’m supposed to be the help-mate God intended me to be when he made me.

My husband doesn’t like the words, “I’m sorry”. He says they’re useless words. If you’re really sorry, you should change your behavior. He’s right. It says in the word that a truly repentant man will not only say he’s sorry, but his heart and behavior should be changed too. So, I’m not going to say that to him (he reads my blogs). I’m just going to ask him to forgive me, yet again.

Proverbs 25:28 says the following:

He whose spirit is without restraint is like a city that is broken down and without walls

Where do you lack self-control? Is it drinking, eating, anger, spending or sexual encounters? Where is your struggle?

In 1 Corinthians 5:11 it says,

But as it is, I wrote unto you not to keep company, if any man that is named a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner, with such a one no, not to eat

It says this, because when you are with these sort of people, it is hard to maintain self-control. Are there things or people in your life that make it hard to maintain your self-control? Perhaps it’s time to get rid of them or see someone less often, if at all? Pray about this and take God’s leading.

In Proverbs 25:26 it says,

As a troubled fountain, and a corrupted spring, So is a righteous man that giveth way before the wicked.

As I said above, people know a Christian by their actions. In Titus 2:12, we are told to live a godly life in the earth now.

Instructing us, to the intent that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly and righteously and godly in this present world.

Read the warning in Galatians 5:21

Envyings, drunkenness, revellings, an such like; of which I forewarn you, even as I did forewarn you, that they who practice such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.

Everything in this life takes self-control in one way or another and of something. There always will be consequences to your lack of self-control. Always. Pray for self-control. Remember, we weren’t told to do this ourselves. Self-control is not an act of will power as the world would have you believe. Self-control is decisions constantly made each moment of our lives. It is a fruit of the Spirit every Christian should strive to achieve. The good news is that God will help you attain it.

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Posted in Fruits of the Spirit
3 comments on “It’s a Good Thing
  1. Crystal says:

    I def struggle with some of those. Good post Tammee.


  2. Phoenicia says:

    Wow – nothing more true than God’s word.

    Thank you for being transparent with your readers. It could not have been easy.

    My husband has a dislike to the word “sorry”. He feels it is over used. I admit to leaning on this especially when we first married.

    I struggled to accept my failings and did not think I could change. I was and still am a Christian.

    I am still on a journey. I mess up from time to time but take full responsibility for my actions.


  3. Tammee says:

    Thank you for taking time to comment. And yes I try to be as transparent as possible because I want to be real to my readers. I think people are tired of Christians pretending to be perfect or have it all together. If we did, why would we need God, his forgiveness and grace. The word says we all fall short of the glory. I’m not any different.

    I’m not a perfect Christian. None of us are.

    As a Christian I want to show believers and nonbelievers alike that I deal with the same issues everyone else in this world does. Jesus didn’t promise believers an easy life. He promised we wouldn’t have to face trials alone.

    Thank you for noticing my attempt at transparency. It’s not always easy. I just believe transparency with anyone is what makes them more creditable, you know? Saying, “Hey I’m not special. I’m just like you.” goes a long way.

    Thanks for being an avid follower of my blog. I appreciate you, your comments and every other follower too.


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